NOTE :
% => user must run C- Shell (csh). $ => user must run Bourne-Shell (sh).
% who is my match? No match.
% sleep with me bad character
% got a light? No match.
% "How would you rate Reagan's incompetence? Unmatched ".
% "How would you rate Reagan's senility? Unmatched ".
% 'thou shalt not commit adultery' thou shalt not commit adultery: Command not found.
% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa? Missing ]. % If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s. % If I had a ) for every dollar Reagan spent, what would I have? Too many )'s.
% ^What is saccharine? Bad substitute.
% ^How did the^sex change operation go? Modifier failed.
% %blow %blow: No such job.
% %Vice-President %Vice-President: No such job.
% \(- (-: Command not found.
% date me You are not superuser: date not set Thu Aug 25 15:52:30 PDT 1988
% make bottle.open Make: Don't know how to make bottle.open. Stop.
% make 'heads or tails of all this' Make: Don't know how to make heads or tails of all this. Stop.
% make light Make: Don't know how to make light. Stop.
% make love Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
% make mistake Make: Don't know how to make mistake. Stop.
% make sense Make: Don't know how to make sense. Stop.
% man rear No manual entry for rear.
% man: why did you get a divorce? man:: Too many arguments.
% ar m God ar: God does not exist % rm God rm: God nonexistent % rm -i God rm: remove God? y
% ls God God not found
% rm meese-ethics rm: meese-ethics nonexistent
% * How would you describe George Bush *: Ambiguous.
% ls Meese-Ethics Meese-Ethics not found
% cp /dev/null sex;chmod 000 sex % more sex sex: Permission denied % mv sex show % strip show strip: show: Permission denied
% set i="Democratic_Platform";mkdir $i;chmod 000 $i;ls $i Democratic_Platform unreadable
% awk "Polly, the ship is sinking" awk: syntax error near line 1 awk: bailing out near line
----------------------------------------------------------------- % sh
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense no sense in pretending!
$ drink matter matter: cannot create
$ test my argument test: too many arguments
$ "Amelia Earhart" Amelia Earhart: not found
$ man -kisses dog dog: nothing appropriate
$ mkdir "Yellow Pages";fiYellow Pages $ mkdir matter;cat > matter matter: cannot create
$ lost lost: not found
$ found found: not found
$ i=Hoffa ;>$i ;$i ;rm $i ;rm $i Hoffa: cannot execute rm: Hoffa nonexistent
-----------------------------------------------------------------
The following ones don't work on BSD 4.3, so I suppose that they are stuff from ATT SysV or some other such:
% strip bra bra: Cannot open
% sccs what bottle can't open bottle (26)
$ cat "door: paws too slippery" can't open door: paws too slippery
$ cat food_in_tin_cans cat: can't open food_in_tin_cans
Whenever I sense someone looking over my shoulder I type in one of the above. And, of course, I keep a file in my home directory called README which contains the following line for snoopers:
cat: README: not found
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